Just a little letter for my babies...

Dear Lydi and Gray,

Please stop growing. It's happening WAY too fast. I don't want to think of the day where Grayson isn't chasing you, Lydia, and trying to give you big, open mouth, sloppy kisses. Oh Lydi, I know you're not always going to want your 'tiny tiny blankey' in order to sleep. Grayson you MUST have your sock monkey at night, it's so cute. Last night you made sure to grab it before I pulled you out of your crib to nurse and you insisted on snuggling him the whole time. Both of you are so small & despite the fact that Lydia is turning 3 in less than a month, I have a hard time imagining both of you as anything but my sweet little babies. I'll leave all of the "I wonder what you'll be when you grow up" for when you grow up. I don't even want to think about anything like that yet! I just want to take in every moment holding your tiny hands, rocking you at night, looking at you while you're sleeping, kissing your owies, playing pretend and eating your pretend cooking, kissing your little toes one by one, rubbing your heads, tickling you both under your chins, and so much more it would take me days to write. I treasure you both so much. I love the personalities that you both have. You're so smart, loving, caring, and full of energy and wonder. I am so very thankful for you two and I know that you're daddy is too. So since I do realize that every day you still are going to grow no matter what I do, lets spend every waking and sleeping minute enjoying the blessings that you are and having fun together. I want to snuggle you longer, spoil you with love more, and teach you all about the environment around you. I promise to try my best and let go of my selfishness, my frustrations, and 'need' to keep everything clean because life is so much better without it! I want to get on the floor with you more and play pretend, go outside and go exploring, take you to places that will stretch your little minds, and show you things that you could never have imagined. I also want to read you more books & take you to the library and let you read as many as you want. I want to minimize all 'screen time' and enjoy harboring your beautiful imaginations. I love you two so much. I truly want the best for you.

Love, Your Momma <3

Happy New Year!

Gray·son

 [grey-suhn]

noun:

1. A sensitive little boy with an extremely soft heart.

2. A wild tornado that waddles around the house unfolding laundry and stuffing it in kitchen cupboards and gives anything in it's path to the dog.

3. An alarm clock that wakes mom up 3-4 times a night.

4. A vacuum that eats up anything in it's wake, food or otherwise.

5. A VERY sneaky little booger that steals things from his sister and runs away giggling.

6. A future mountain climber that climbs on chairs, tables, toys, couches, beds, and anything else that happens to be in front of him.

7. Both the most annoying little brother and best friend to Lydia.

Synonyms: Stinky dinky doo, stink pot, stinky, little buddy, buddy bear, sweet boy, sugar bear

I'm learning more and more how difficult it is to function when this little man is awake! Thank goodness for Lydia who follows him around undoing his destructive-ness most of the time. If it weren't for my 'big helper'... well lets just say my house would be in a worse condition than it already is! Oh my babies are growing up! Woe is me :(

Grayson is taking on this task of turning into a destructive two year old something fierce while Lydia is working extremely hard on becoming a big 3 year old. I've been working on teaching Lydia how to help around the house. She's doing great at putting her laundry away, placing clothes on hangers, sorting the silverware and putting them away, washing anything plastic, and cleaning up after herself (and even brother!). 

SO awesome!

Fits aren't as frequent anymore (Grayson is quickly filling in those shoes!) and she's been so much more obedient. I haven't had to use 'the spoon' very often anymore. We've kind of transitioned to something that works SO much better for her. Whenever she's whining, throwing a fit, or isn't being a 'good listener', her nose goes to the wall for 2 minutes. I know it sounds silly, but we just don't have a good time out corner... so instead... it's just a spot on the wall that she keeps her nose on until her time is up. SHE HATES it. Very effective & it doesn't take long.

Grayson and Lydia are so different... all it takes to punish him is a firm no.

He's such a sensitive little guy! He falls apart into a puddle of tears if you just raise your eyebrows at him. I wonder what he's going to be like when he's her age? I guess time will tell... and sooner than I'd like!

So I thought I'd share a few of Lydia's favorite things right now... simply because I don't want to forget!

Activities: playing pretend, going outside, painting/anything crafty, riding her bike, helping mom around the house

Favorite toys: her new leapster book reading thingy (she'll spend hours 'reading' at night if we don't take it away), her baby dolls (she has two in particular), her back pack that she fills with random things (she's always on her way to Alaska or nana's house), stick sticks (stickers), the tin tea set that we all have to pretend to drink out of, and anything Grayson has... because obviously whatever he has is better.

Phrases: "Oh my WOW", "OH my goodness", "I can do it", "I think I can", "No NO Grayson!".

Best Friends: Jack Jack, Oh-Oh, Ava, Max, Towee, Chase, Bwytan (She prays for them every night!)

So update on me? Well things are changing so much around here! It's a new year and even more change is coming sooner than I'd like to think (more on that later). My mind has been fighting to stay on the present rather than on what's coming next and I fear that I'm losing the battle! I'm starting a 52-week organize your home kinda deal... and that's going to be quite the challenge for me... and I'm working on some DIY projects and ideas off of pinterest. I need something creative to keep the artist/musician in me at bay! I guess you could say I have some new 'resolutions'... to pray with focus and all of my heart, position myself to hear from the Spirit in even the littlest things (and follow through!), and to seek the Lord in his living Word with intention and purpose. It's not necessarily a 'New year' kind of thing, but more of an ongoing desire to become closer to Christ and rely on Him more in the everyday.

okay... I really need to go. In the time it's taken for me to type this Grayson has strewn crumbs all over the floor and couch from a piece of bread that I have no idea of the origin. My laundry is clearly unfolded now and all over the living room (I also should check the cupboards). I can see that the dog has obtained some new toys and is chewing on the batman sippy- Lydi will not be pleased. My dish towels are draped over the piano, there's chalk on the floor, and there are books EVERYWHERE.

oof.

Grayson turned 1, Christmas happened twice, and I just had a birthday!

Pallows (pillows), honeys (undies), Eggo (Diego), dinky doo (pinky dinky doo), I think I can, I do it, icky poopoo's, OOOH budder (brother), pretties, rite dare, stwower (stroller), I needsta help, boots, choc-oh-late, helmit (remote)...

I love listening to Lydia talk. I absolutely love her sweet little words and how she says each of them in her own little accent. These are just some of my favorites... some of the ones I hear the most. She's given her own names to so many everyday things that I often forget that it's not what other people normally call them. I'm teaching myself how to not speak her language back to her, though. I know it doesn't benefit her when it comes to teaching her the correct pronunciation of things, but my goodness it's hard not to say silly sentences like "I needs lots is a more of dees ones" when she's usually the only little human I talk to all day... everyday.
That and yes, I want to keep her little a lot of the time. I don't want her to grow up. It's so dear to my heart to hear how she's developed her own language to describe her little world... I feel like I see my world differently just from the way she has described it to me in her words.

Grayson's birthday came and went and with not TOO many tears... We celebrated with family the weekend before Christmas. It couldn't have been better. He loved being sang to so much that we sang him happy birthday twice! He ate more cake than I'd like to admit, but it was so extremely cute and I just wanted him to enjoy it. My mom made him a beautiful little sock monkey cake (hopefully I can find and add pictures!). You could tell he knew EXACTLY what it was and who it was for by his sweet little squeals the moment he saw it! He has loved his sock monkey from the moment he received it and it has been his favorite lovey since. Besides his train... it's by far his favorite thing in this house.
I hope that we get to celebrate his birthday with family like that every year. What a blessing!

Christmas with my family was celebrated that same weekend. I don't think I can remember having a better Christmas! All of the kids did great and had such a wonderful time! It was more relaxed than any other Christmas and I really think that everyone there could agree that we all left with full hearts and truly enjoyed our time with each other. We opened presents Saturday morning (my goodness every child was spoiled!). I was able to cook my favorite meal, breakfast, and then the kids played with all of their toys all day. We got everything prepared and cooked for the 'big dinner' and family all slowly arrived. We visited, opened beautiful stockings (just wait until you see how huge mine was! hahaha), and shared gifts that we had chosen for each other. We draw names every year and it's always fun surprising them with something unique and personal! The dinner was amazing and the deserts were even better! We sang birthday songs to my Uncle, Grayson, and myself, opened more presents, and then everyone went their separate ways. Jacob and I had planned to leave the next morning, but after some discussion... we decided it would be safest to leave that evening.
The kids are still loving all of their gifts from santa and I am too!!

This past weekend we celebrated Christmas with just us as a family. It was such a sweet time! I read a book to the kids regarding the birth of Jesus, which Lydia loved, and we celebrated Christmas as a tribute to Christ's birth. Lydia is STILL singing 'Happy Birthday baby Jesus' around the house!
We opened presents, nothing big, but just a few things special that we had got for each other, and had our friends for dinner. All of the kids played well together and had a great time as did we. It was such a wonderful Christmas this year!

The day after was my birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!!! I'm now 24, be amazed, I know. I'm getting so stinkin old! Jacob came home and brought me beautiful flowers and a yummy peppermint starbucks! It was wonderful :)

So here comes the new year! I'm excited to be starting a new year full of new adventures! I haven't fully thought of any new year resolutions, but I'm sure that I will. Probably some new plan to build some muscle on these bones, learn a new craft, play more music, or finally sew Lydia's quilt that I started BEFORE she was born :/. I'm not sure yet, but when I know... you'll know.

Jacob and I hadn't planned on being in this picture, but neither of the kids wanted near Santa! :)

Grayson in his sock monkey little get up with his lovey

Me and my GINORMOUS stocking full of goodies!

My mom had a wool sock monkey dress... of course I had to put it on! haha... (ignore my lack of make up!)

A photo of all of the stockings together.. you can tell Jenna and I are the favorites here! ;)

Grayson seeing his cake with his cousin Autumn (otter pop)

Want some??

So handsome!!!

Lydia concentrating on opening everything in her stocking :)

The adorable cake and cupcakes!

MY beautiful cake my mom made me...  COMPLETELY dairy and gluten free!!! <3

Oh baby Gray...

Thanksgiving went well! It was so very wonderful to have my house full of family and smelling of yumminess. I already wish I could have them all back again! I'm not sure that I'll be doing it again for a long while though. It is just such a long drive to my house for everyone that came. They all arrived early to be able to spend more time with each other, but that's when I'm in the kitchen the most. It made it hard for me to spend time with them. Then they all needed to make the long trek home early enough to avoid freezing roads, which meant for only about 4 hours spent with them total... most of which I was either in the kitchen or cleaning up. Don't get me wrong, I had a FANTASTIC time! I LOVED doing the cooking and serving my family. I even loved trying to squish that many people into our little kitchen and dining room.
I keep trying to convince them all to move here, but they're just not having it! :)
So next year we'll most likely be spending it at my mom's beautiful home and I'll just have to talk her into letting me come a day ahead and we can cook our little fingers off together again.
That was definitely the part of Thanksgiving that I think I treasured the most, spending time cooking with my mom. We work so well together weaving around the kitchen and never even knocking into each other despite the small space. We are a well oiled machine and once we get started then there's no stopping us!

My sweet little family and I just returned from a trip to Grammy and Grandpa Buddy's house in Grants Pass. We brought Uncle Seth along with us too. The crazy kook volunteered to hold Juneau the entire drive down! June surprisingly did REALLY well, but we had no idea what to expect. Praise God for no puppy accidents in our car! Anywho, back to talking about Grammy's...
Can I just say I love it there?
They have such a wonderful place and we love spending time there with them. The kids and Juneau had the run of the place, which Grammy and Bud so sweetly baby proofed, and they had a blast! Grayson had a ton of fun toting around all of Grammy's potatoes and trying to eat them raw. Lydia entertained all of us, as always, and June... well she's June! She played well with Gray and entertained us too with all of her sweet puppyness. Jacob, Seth, and Bud watched endless hours of football and I even got a chance to read a book! It was wonderful! I'm glad that Grammy and Bud are here for the winter and I hope that we get to go see them again soon. They're so full of love and are a joy to be around and the kids adore being with them too!

Now starts the week of trying to get back on schedule, grocery shop and meal plan for the next two weeks, unpack from our trip, do laundry, and plan for Grayson's birthday!

EEEEEEK!!!!!! I can't believe that his birthday is only a week away!
I had big ideas planned for his birthday. I wanted it to be just as fun and decorated as Lydia's was. I wanted to make him a beautiful cake just as well thought out as Lydia's castle cake was, and have a lot of friends over to celebrate him too. I know that he won't remember it. I know that he probably could care less. He probably wouldn't even notice the decorations much, might even get overwhelmed if there's too many people here, and will probably care less what his cake looks like as long as he gets to eat and his sister doesn't steal any of his ;).
As silly as it is, though, I still want to do it for him. This 1st year mark is huge to me. It's celebrating making it through all of the hard sleepless nights, watching him grow from my sweet little 6 pound 9 oz newborn to my toddler that's trying so hard to keep up with his sister, and remembering every little stage he went through to get here. Every moment of his first year is engraved into my heart and I just want to celebrate it!! Can you blame me??
I know that there won't be a HUGE party, but I'm going to try and put something together for him. I hope that he'll have another little friend or two here to play with, some fun and shiny decorations to look at (and I'm sure tear down), and a cute cake to dig his sweet little fingers into.

Grayson,
I love you so much my sweet baby boy. From the moment you were born we have had such a strong bond. You were such a sweet and snuggly baby. When you were a newborn and I had to sleep with you on my chest you would squirm your way all the way under my chin. You wanted to be snuggled up as close as you could to your momma. Your adorable little fingers would hold a death grip on my shirt so that I wouldn't put you down, I didn't. For four weeks I slept on the couch while you slept on my chest and hardly left my arms. I didn't want to be away from you either! When other moms reveled in their little ones sleeping through the night, I do admit I was a bit jealous at times, but as soon as I would go in to nurse you.. you'd curl up under my chin again. I still wake up with you... not because I know you can't sleep through the night without it if I tried to teach you, but because I simply treasure rocking you when you sleep. I find myself fighting to get back into my own bed as I hold you, but knowing I have to give in or I won't be able to keep up with you during the day too! You have such a beautiful little grin, these super cute little stinky feet, and the best little chubbies on the planet. You're constantly getting into 'trouble'. You climb everything, go through all of my cupboards and drawers, and eat anything in your path.
I really don't want to know some of the things that have made it into your mouth :|
Your sister is always getting you to do her dirty work while knowing full well that you'll get in less trouble than she will- I'm working on that-. How can I punish you when you give me your cute little squinty grin?? I definitely don't want to see your sad face, oh how it instantly breaks my heart!
You are starting to learn what fits are, surely from your mischievous big sister, and I'm learning how to adjust. Your favorite toys are anything you can pull, hit, smash, makes noise, or you can make sound effects to. Either that or my phone, that works too.
You love talking on the phone/skyping with your nana or dada. As soon as I get a call on my phone you're already at my feet tugging on me jabbering to talk.
My boy you can dance! You've got the cute little bounce down and you're learning how to wink... what else do you need?
You're just a joy to be around and I love you. I am already missing my sweet little newborn with those beautiful little eyes looking up at me, but I'm excited to see who you become and to enjoy the adventure along the way. I will forever celebrate this first year that we have spent together. I love you baby bear, Your Momma

I'm not ready!!!

I just realized that yesterday was the 14th... which means that Grayson's birthday is now less than a month away! How did this happen?! He is my BABY boy! I am almost positive he just came out of my belly a couple days ago right? Wow... now I feel like there's no time to prepare for a party! I know what you're thinking... Oh it's easy... just get some plates, napkins, make a cake, send an invite, and then you're good! The thing is, I'm thinking emotionally here. I am just.not.ready. for this. Maybe this is why parents often say their little ones ages in terms of months. That could be me, I guess? "Hello, my baby is 46 months old." "No, he's not a toddler... I just had him 32 months ago."
What if I start feeding him purees again? I could do that too!
Okay, okay.. I'll stop being ridiculous. It's just going to take me a while to come to terms with this. That and I need to go order some plates and napkins and send those invites out....

FYI if you're reading this and you're planning on coming and you're one of those people that plan ahead (and obviously I haven't thought ahead and sent invitations yet)... It will be an all love, tickles, cake, snuggles, refreshments, and no gifts kind of party. (We currently have so many toys that they should rent their own storage shed.) I'm excited to celebrate my sweet boy with all of you and love on him and watch him, and I'm sure lydia too, eat their own weight in cake too!

Oh Grayson my sweet baby boy, we love you!!!

How could anyone resist those cute ears, beautiful eyes, little button nose, and that amazingly sweet smile?!